I’m having brain surgery.

brain-surgery

The title of this post is not click-bait.

I’m literally having brain surgery.

I don’t even know where to begin with this. It’s so detailed and elaborate how we’ve come to the point of my name being on a surgery schedule. I just keep thinking how this story is going to be in a book that I write some day. A book about waiting. About enduring with joy. I started that book a long time ago [with our infertility] but He just keeps adding layers of depth to the same narrative.

I’ve found myself wallowing in guilt for not documenting in writing every detail that has happened to me and my health because that’s what I do – I write. Writing is healing but it’s only seemed laborious in all of this. But these words stumbled in my path articulated the dust storm that’s happened in my heart as I’ve dealt with my health mystery…

“I think there are times to write about what has happened to us and then I think there are times to allow what’s happening to us to just happen. No writing it down. No trying to make it eloquent. No forcibly documenting it for the world to comment on.” – Hannah Brencher

So I haven’t written. It most certainly won’t be eloquent at this point because I’ve just been…managing…and wondering at what point is it time to move past management to putting on boots and getting to work.

I don’t know.

But I know it’s not right now. Because the work I need to do is to get healthy so I can be the best wife and mom I can be. That’s where the priority work is right now.

For now, you get an abbreviated version. I just wanted to tell you where I’m at…

I have hydrocephalus and I’m having brain surgery to fix it.

I never thought I’d be happy to have a name for all the pain I’ve been through. And I’m having surgery December 13th on my brain after nearly 2 years of searching for answers. Somehow I managed to film and edit a video for you to help explain what I can.

I’ll see you on the other side.

And don’t think I didn’t type that with out singing “I’ll see you on the other siiiiiiiiide!” #adele

  • Allison Humble - Hannah! Sweet girl! I am sorry you’re having to go through this but so grateful you finally have answers and a solution. I am believing with you that this will work and you will have a speedy recovery. I will absolutely pray for you and the surgeons.
    Habakkuk 3:17-19…so encouraging!
    Love,
    AllisonReplyCancel

  • Sam Mathis - Just saw your picture on facebook and had to come find out what was going on. Praying for a smooth surgery today and fast recovery.

    As a thought, if this stenosis was a chronic issue, it would explain why you had such a bad reaction to the lumbar puncture. If you were not getting good spinal fluid out to the spinal cord, the fluid they took out from the lumbar puncture would have created a void that would give you the severe headaches because your body didn’t actually refill the area with spinal fluid like it should have.

    Anyways, praying for you, Aaron, your family, and the doctors today.ReplyCancel

    • hannah_bunker - Just now catching up on blog comments. That makes sense about the LP! Thank you for the explanation and for the prayers as well. ReplyCancel

  • Robyn - Just found your blog a couple of seconds ago when searching for vday ideas ( found your 52 reasons…)

    Praying for you during this time! you’ll come out so much stronger and better than before.ReplyCancel

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